When I Knew

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I’d dream of mushroom clouds in the horizon

Like the berth of a new sun

It’s placenta rolled over the trees

Like a tide of gold leaving nothing but dust

So it was we ran in the dark

And hid behind the heaviest of rock

Next to me a nameless face in a nameless place

We watched our brothers burn before it would stop I meet a familiar soul through the chaos

Her eyes as torn as the world outside

Through an exchange of nostalgia

What news could gut me with a rusty knife?

Green eyes, soft skin, an angel’s face

What was left of God was in her memory

I punched my knuckles to slivers

Hauling the weight of words so heavily

In the darkness I wished it was me to sunder

To fade into billions of pieces

Let the grieve die

Because nothing has to mean

I opened my eyes from the nightmare

The brokenness and emptiness lingered like a rot

I sat at the foot of my bed, head in hand,

Aware that one thing was true: I should have fought

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